Company Picnic

So my companies picnic was this past weekend at Kings Island. It is usually nice because there is free food and beer. Thus, I was there. I mean fried chicken, pulled pork, Budweiser, and roller coasters go together. That is just a fact. There is no way you would ever feel sick combining all those things. Thankfully, I am a badass so I could combine those things and be fine. There was just one element that was added that really jacked up my world. The weather. When we first got there, the weather was not that bad. I mean it was chilly and there was overcast but that was it, there was no rain. I was wearing jeans and a long sleeve shirt which I thought was plenty. But this is Jeremy we are talking about here. I have the same luck as that chick in the amazing race that took a miniature watermelon to the face. While there I only went on 2 roller coasters because the lines were long we were passing time at other places waiting for the rain to start. If you have ever been to Kings Island you will probably be able to recognize the two rides I went on. The beast and the diamondback. Each ride took about an hour to get on, which is not to bad with all the fucking people that were everywhere. But each god damn time I finally go on the ride it would start to pour when we were going up the first hill. FML. It was so cold, I mean it really helped that The Beast is the longest fucking wooden roller coaster in the world and I only got soaked for like 5 minutes or the duration of that fucker. Then the Diamondback did the same fucking thing except it goes 80 miles per hour so the rain felt like BB's hitting me in the god damn face. Needless to say, I can now say I have officially been on a roller coaster while maintaining the fetal position. I mostly used my hands to cover my eyes. People saw the pictures after the ride and laughed. Therefore, I am happy.