So I went on a date last week but I think I need to start with how this date developed for you to really get this picture. I play co-rec softball on Wednesday's and we usually grab a beer or two either before the game or after because you get beer tickets. So the bar that these beer tickets are good for is called Mount Lookout Tavern or MLT's but i think is also known as ML-Dudes because it is known to be frequented by a lot of guys. But anyway I was there with my team and we were just having a good time when i decided to head down to the bar and get another pitcher of beer with our other ticket. When i went down i found an opening at the bar to request my free pitcher of Coors light. That's when the girl next to me whispered "help me." When i first heard this I was like who said that and if it's a ghost fuck my life... I hate ghosts. Instead of me having a six sense it was the girl next to me who was wearing a nice black and white dress. So naturally I looked at her and said "What?" That's when she explained how she was on a horrible date and he went to the bathroom. Now how she thought i was going to help her beats me. I guess if after this weekend I could have rescued her from her date by showing my medal i got from the Urbanathlon and yelled come with me Miss there are puppies in trees that are on fire that need rescuing and I need you to hold the wicker basket as I toss them in. (Joke from the weekend) However, this medal did not exist yet so I was just like not sure how i can help you. That's when she said well you can take me on a real date. Which was true. Who the fuck takes a date to MLT's? I have that about equal to someone taking their 1st date to their colonoscopy appointment. Just not a good impression, but who am I to judge. Anyways we exchanged numbers and she texted me the next day before I could even text her asking when we were going out. So I set up a date and we headed to Cock and Bull in Covington to have a beer. While there I wasn't nervous or anything and was just my crazy self making jokes that are probably inappropriate for a first date. But guess what, if you can't handle it a little on the first date it's not going to work out because I am not going to change from my witty banter self. When I went to the bathroom for the 1st time though I was like... I wonder what the hell she is thinking. Is she whispering to some other dude and being like save me? Is that her line to pick up a different dude each time. If so, oh well. At least I not like fully committed to this girl and this is our 5th date or something. Shit I haven't made it past like a 3rd date since my ex from college. We chatted for a good two hours and I thought things went well. She laughed and snorted which I take as a good sign. Forget what I was talking about but i am pretty sure it was about how I feel like i am the most coordinated clumsy guy I know. After the night was over I walked her to her car she gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek and we parted. Better than a handshake I guess. She texted me late that night as well to tell me how funny I was and how this was the funnest 1st date she has been on (
EGO BOOST 1) So, of course was like well we should get together again. No response. I was like ok maybe she went to bed. Well she got my e-mail from friending me on facebook I guess because I got an e-mail from her 2 days later stating the following "I had a great time with you, however I think our personalities clash too much to be romantically involved." then the rest was like yada yada yada excuse... let's be friends you know the typical. (
EGO CRUSH 1) I responded with alright. Well it was nice to meet you. Then trying to figure out what flaw in my personality causes this. Finally after thinking about that for 3.2 seconds I was like wait. I have a fucking amazing personality. Shit, I won best personality my senior year in high school. I like my sense of humor. So at this point I knew this girl was fucking nuts and moved on. Then came this weekend. The crazy bitch sent me another e-mail saying sorry and she really did have a lot of fun and thinks she jumped to conclusions to early about our "clashing." She wanted to go out again. Of course I responded no and that her first instinct was probably the right one. Our personalities did clash. Mine is fucking awesome and yours sucked balls. (
EGO BOOST 2) :)
